Marriage
Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want then, when you see what the other person has, you wish you had ordered that.
Man: Is there any way for long life?
Dr: Get married.
Man: Will it help?
Dr: No, but the thought of long life will never come.
Why do couples hold hands during their wedding?
It's a formality just like two boxers shaking hands before the fight begins!
Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do?
Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.
It's funny when people discuss Love Marriage vs Arranged.
It's like asking someone, if suicide is better or being murdered.
It is difficult to understand GOD. He makes such beautiful things as women and then he turns them into Wives.
If u r married please ignore this msg,
for everyone else: Happy Independence Day
Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you say.
After marriage, he'll fall asleep before you finish.
There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage.
Man receives telegram: Wife dead-should be buried or cremated?
Man: Don't take any chances. Burn the body and bury the ash.
Prospective husband: Do you have a book called 'Man, The Master of Women'?
Salesgirl: The fiction department is on the other side, sir.
Q: Why dogs don't marry?
A: Because they are already leading a dog's life!
There was this guy who told his woman that he loved her so much that he would go through hell for her. They got married and now he is going thru hell.
Fact of life: One woman brings you into this world crying & the other ensures you continue to do so for the rest of your life!
Q: Why doesn't law permit a man to marry a second woman?
A: Because as per law you cannot be punished twice for the same offence!
July 18, 2008
July 16, 2008
July 15, 2008
Try this Calculation !!!!
1) key-in the first 3 digits of your handphone number (exclude the first number '9') into the calculator
2) multiply by 80
3) add 1
4) multiply by 250
5) plus last four digits of phone number
6) plus last four digits of phone number again
7) minus 250
8) divide by 2 at last
Is it your handphone number ????
2) multiply by 80
3) add 1
4) multiply by 250
5) plus last four digits of phone number
6) plus last four digits of phone number again
7) minus 250
8) divide by 2 at last
Is it your handphone number ????
July 13, 2008
July 8, 2008
July 3, 2008
June 27, 2008
olah raga oiiiiiiiiiiii
We went mountain biking with our little cute fold able bicycle. 12" Wheels 4 speed.
Heck of a trouble to cycle up those hills... Good training....
Recommend everyone to have a walk there
Heck of a trouble to cycle up those hills... Good training....
Recommend everyone to have a walk there
June 23, 2008
Makan Pagi de Delifrance
Breakfast @ 10am ............
Egg and More eggs with its relative on a dinner plate.
Sat n Pepper - Always in a pair .......
Serene cup f hot tea.... good Morning Singapore !!
Modern Era in History..........
Egg and More eggs with its relative on a dinner plate.
Sat n Pepper - Always in a pair .......
Serene cup f hot tea.... good Morning Singapore !!
Modern Era in History..........
June 21, 2008
Dang Dang Dang Dang Dang - Wedding Bells Ringing !!!
The dates are set, the placed are reserved. The clothes are ready the days are coming !!!
WE ARE GETTING MARRIED !!!!!!!!!!
May all the wedding bells in Singapore ring to this joyous day 7th December 2008!!!!
我们要结婚了 ！！！！！
WE ARE GETTING MARRIED !!!!!!!!!!
May all the wedding bells in Singapore ring to this joyous day 7th December 2008!!!!
我们要结婚了 ！！！！！
June 20, 2008
The fight must goes on !!!!!!!!
The dark cloud fills the clear blue sky, sunlight slowly dims as the sky become overcast. Strong gust of wind sweep across the empty field. Lighting streaks across the dark sky, thunder rumbles shattering any ear drum thats stays too close to it.
Yinky, badly battered by the hash orders of MILY- the evil mother of all mouths. The word exits her mouth like bullets from a machine guns firing at 3000 rounds per minute.
"YINKY !!!!!!!! Why the HELL are your stuff blocking my stuff !!!!! You have 20 seconds to get your stuff away from this spot and your 20 seconds began 5 seconds ago !!!!" The orders fired by MILY seems like a rocket propelled grenade exploding sending YINKY into frantic mode as she start removing her stuff.
MILY sets of a evil grin as she see YINKY. " Iknow you don't like it... BUT i still want you to have it.. muahahahahahahaaaa" As Yinky is doing her stuff, Mly stand by the field unleashing her hush words at Yinky.
Yinky could take it no more. She fired back at Mily. The sly Mily notice her retaliation and transform herself into a monkey and dodged from the fire. Yinky is a novice, she can only rattle out 1% of Mily. Mily in turn turns herself into a lion and gave Yinky a sonic roar.
Yinky was blast backwards by the sonic waves. "YOU ANIMAL !!!!!" Yinky shouted. "hahahahahahahaaa YOU ARE NO MATCH FOR ME YINKY" "I can shape shift" Mily said as she shap shifted back to human form.
Mily walked up to Yinky "thank you so much... i know you took good care of this thing that requires 24 hours of attention...but... why are you so lazy not to spend some time making something for me to eat? " "I am hungry and now you will be my dinner!!!!!" Mily turns herself into a Hippo. "Now you shall be my dinner!!!!"
Yinky now could stand Mily no more!!! for the past few months, she had endure her trashing and mutilation. Her freedom being taken away and her life being suck out from her soul.
As Mily in her Hippo form began closing on Yinky, Yinky stood up and shouted at Mily. "YOU BITCH, YOU ANIMAL, i can stand you no more!!!! A tiger never show you its power, you treat it as a sick cat. Today, i will banish you from this place, once and for all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Yinky leaps over Mily and open a door to a shed by the end of the field and took out a secret weapon which she had kept since she know Mily. The "SAM - Super-duper Anti MIL"
She aimed the gun at Mily's big hippo mouth. "I wanted to get along with you well, but you over step the thick fat line. Today, i shall stand no more of your ANIMAL nonsense. You left me no choice. I want my life back, my freedom, my everything."
Yinky squeezes the trigger................
The dark cloud began to dissipate. The sunlight penetrates the slowly dissolving dark clouds.
A scent of fresh breeze fills the air.
The day had finally come.
But its a dream. Yinky wakes up to the constant yanking in the back ground.
One day your dream will come true. Just believe it will !!!!
Yinky, badly battered by the hash orders of MILY- the evil mother of all mouths. The word exits her mouth like bullets from a machine guns firing at 3000 rounds per minute.
"YINKY !!!!!!!! Why the HELL are your stuff blocking my stuff !!!!! You have 20 seconds to get your stuff away from this spot and your 20 seconds began 5 seconds ago !!!!" The orders fired by MILY seems like a rocket propelled grenade exploding sending YINKY into frantic mode as she start removing her stuff.
MILY sets of a evil grin as she see YINKY. " Iknow you don't like it... BUT i still want you to have it.. muahahahahahahaaaa" As Yinky is doing her stuff, Mly stand by the field unleashing her hush words at Yinky.
Yinky could take it no more. She fired back at Mily. The sly Mily notice her retaliation and transform herself into a monkey and dodged from the fire. Yinky is a novice, she can only rattle out 1% of Mily. Mily in turn turns herself into a lion and gave Yinky a sonic roar.
Yinky was blast backwards by the sonic waves. "YOU ANIMAL !!!!!" Yinky shouted. "hahahahahahahaaa YOU ARE NO MATCH FOR ME YINKY" "I can shape shift" Mily said as she shap shifted back to human form.
Mily walked up to Yinky "thank you so much... i know you took good care of this thing that requires 24 hours of attention...but... why are you so lazy not to spend some time making something for me to eat? " "I am hungry and now you will be my dinner!!!!!" Mily turns herself into a Hippo. "Now you shall be my dinner!!!!"
Yinky now could stand Mily no more!!! for the past few months, she had endure her trashing and mutilation. Her freedom being taken away and her life being suck out from her soul.
As Mily in her Hippo form began closing on Yinky, Yinky stood up and shouted at Mily. "YOU BITCH, YOU ANIMAL, i can stand you no more!!!! A tiger never show you its power, you treat it as a sick cat. Today, i will banish you from this place, once and for all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Yinky leaps over Mily and open a door to a shed by the end of the field and took out a secret weapon which she had kept since she know Mily. The "SAM - Super-duper Anti MIL"
She aimed the gun at Mily's big hippo mouth. "I wanted to get along with you well, but you over step the thick fat line. Today, i shall stand no more of your ANIMAL nonsense. You left me no choice. I want my life back, my freedom, my everything."
Yinky squeezes the trigger................
The dark cloud began to dissipate. The sunlight penetrates the slowly dissolving dark clouds.
A scent of fresh breeze fills the air.
The day had finally come.
But its a dream. Yinky wakes up to the constant yanking in the back ground.
One day your dream will come true. Just believe it will !!!!
June 11, 2008
Random Photographs
Recently, i have this urge to go around to take photographs with my little Dopod 838pro handphone.
Well here are the outcomes :
May 26, 2008
牵手
因为爱着你的爱 - Because I love your love
因为梦着你的梦 - Because I dream your dreams
所以悲伤着你的悲伤 - Therefore sad because of your sadness
幸福着你的幸福 - Blessed because you are blessed
因为路过你的路 - Because our path crossed
因为苦过你的苦 - Sad because of your sadness
所以快乐着你的快乐 - Happy because of your happiness
追逐着你的追逐 - Chase after what you are chasing after
因为誓言不敢听 - Don't dare to listen to promises
因为承诺不敢信 - Don't dare to believe in promises
所以放心着你的沉默 - I trust in your slience
去说服明天的命运 - Convience myself of our future
没有风雨躲得过 - No storm we can avoid
没有坎坷不必走 - No rough road we can aviod
所以安心的牵你的手 - Therefore in trust i hold your hands
不去想该不该回头 - Not hinking of turning back
也许牵了手的手 - In our hands we hold
前生不一定好走 - Road ahead might not be smooth
也许有了伴的路 - Because we have a partner along the way
今生还要更忙碌 - Journey might be harder
所以牵了手的手 - In our hands we hold
来生还要一起走 - Next life we shall walk together again
所以有了伴的路 - Because we have a partner along the way
没有岁月可回头 - No more we can look back on the years
因为爱着你的爱 - Because I love your love
因为梦着你的梦 - Because I dream your dreams
所以悲伤着你的悲伤 - Therefore sad because of your sadness
幸福着你的幸福 - Blessed because you are blessed
因为路过你的路 - Because our path crossed
因为苦过你的苦 - Sad because of your sadness
所以快乐着你的快乐 - Happy because of your happiness
追逐着你的追逐 - Chase after what you are chasing after
因为誓言不敢听 - Don't dare to listen to promises
因为承诺不敢信 - Don't dare to believe in promises
所以放心着你的沉默 - I trust in your slience
去说服明天的命运 - Convience myself of our future
没有风雨躲得过 - No storm we can avoid
没有坎坷不必走 - No rough road we can aviod
所以安心的牵你的手 - Therefore in trust i hold your hands
不去想该不该回头 - Not hinking of turning back
也许牵了手的手 - In our hands we hold
前生不一定好走 - Road ahead might not be smooth
也许有了伴的路 - Because we have a partner along the way
今生还要更忙碌 - Journey might be harder
所以牵了手的手 - In our hands we hold
来生还要一起走 - Next life we shall walk together again
所以有了伴的路 - Because we have a partner along the way
没有岁月可回头 - No more we can look back on the years
May 21, 2008
May 14, 2008
May 11, 2008
The World is Turning against US !!!
We are all KILLING ourselves.....
If you have noticed, the chain of events are a key sign to self termination of human beings.
Fist of all, we are generation tonnes of green house gases into the atmosphere, creating a global warming. The ice sheet are melting, lands getting flooded, temperature on the rise. I believe all of us had felt that these few weeks are extremely hot.
Oil prices sore to the highest point in history. US$124.20 per barrel. Every human is being affected with the soaring oil prices. electricity bills are rising, cost of transport rises. So, with such hot weather, we tend to use more energy to keep ourselves cool. Thus, uses more fiel to generate electricity, creating more green house gases. More green house gas, the warmer, then more energy we use. The cycle never ends.
So when earth gets hotter, weather pattern changes. Crop harvest fails. Then we have rice shortage as we are experiencing now. So the international environmental watch dog urges all people to go green. Use alternative bio fuel sources. Cut down on the use of fossil fuel.
So farmer now start growing food for the gas tanks rather then the human stomach. Then its worsen the food shortage further.
So are we killing ourselves?
If you have noticed, the chain of events are a key sign to self termination of human beings.
Fist of all, we are generation tonnes of green house gases into the atmosphere, creating a global warming. The ice sheet are melting, lands getting flooded, temperature on the rise. I believe all of us had felt that these few weeks are extremely hot.
Oil prices sore to the highest point in history. US$124.20 per barrel. Every human is being affected with the soaring oil prices. electricity bills are rising, cost of transport rises. So, with such hot weather, we tend to use more energy to keep ourselves cool. Thus, uses more fiel to generate electricity, creating more green house gases. More green house gas, the warmer, then more energy we use. The cycle never ends.
So when earth gets hotter, weather pattern changes. Crop harvest fails. Then we have rice shortage as we are experiencing now. So the international environmental watch dog urges all people to go green. Use alternative bio fuel sources. Cut down on the use of fossil fuel.
So farmer now start growing food for the gas tanks rather then the human stomach. Then its worsen the food shortage further.
So are we killing ourselves?
May 6, 2008
The 10 Commandments of Marriage
The 10 Commandments of Marriage
Commandment 1
Marriages are made in heaven.
But then again, so is thunder and lightning.
Commandment 2
If you want your wife to listen and pay strict attention to every word you
say,
talk in your sleep.
Commandment 3
Marriage is grand -- and divorce is at least 100 grand!
Commandment 4
Married life is very frustrating.
In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens.
In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens.
In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.
Commandment 5
When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one
thing:
Either the car is new or the wife is.
Commandment 6
Marriage is when a man and woman become as one;
The trouble starts when they try to decide which one.
Commandment 7
Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something
you say.
After marriage, he will fall asleep before you finish.
Commandment 8
Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical, and a
good cook.
But the law allows only one wife.
Commandment 9
Marriage and love are purely a matter of chemistry.
That is why one treats the other like toxic waste.
Commandment 10
A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.
Commandment 1
Marriages are made in heaven.
But then again, so is thunder and lightning.
Commandment 2
If you want your wife to listen and pay strict attention to every word you
say,
talk in your sleep.
Commandment 3
Marriage is grand -- and divorce is at least 100 grand!
Commandment 4
Married life is very frustrating.
In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens.
In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens.
In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.
Commandment 5
When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one
thing:
Either the car is new or the wife is.
Commandment 6
Marriage is when a man and woman become as one;
The trouble starts when they try to decide which one.
Commandment 7
Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something
you say.
After marriage, he will fall asleep before you finish.
Commandment 8
Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical, and a
good cook.
But the law allows only one wife.
Commandment 9
Marriage and love are purely a matter of chemistry.
That is why one treats the other like toxic waste.
Commandment 10
A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.
Thank You For your Help... BUT NO THANKS !!!!!!
Dear Prime Minister,
We citizens of singapore urge you to PLEASE MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS.
We DO NOT NEED your help. Every time, you mention HELP, we have to run for cover!!!
Help the poor? Raise GST!
Help traffic flow? Up ERP!
Help passenger service? Up Bus fare/MRT fare!
Help us get taxi? Raise taxi fare!
Help us get good government? Raise Minister and Civil servant salary!
Everytime YOU WANT TO HELP, we all PAY FOR IT!!!
THANK YOU THANK YOU...TOLONG LAH, please, we will HELP OURSELVES, no need your help liao.
We DARE NOT ask for help any more!!!
Sir, most honoured sir, I urge you NOT TO HELP Singapore INVEST also!
Everytime your wife invest, we all lose money! Kao liao, kum siah!
Just let us have a dose of bad governance, like recently the Mat Selamat case, like dat....so far, it is ok, your incompetence, we ACCEPT!
PLEASE DO NOT help us have better security! Wait we all kena PAY FOR IT!!
I believe ALL SINGAPOREANS PREFER NOT TO HAVE CRUTCH MENTALITY!
I think it is ok lah, please just take your salary and enjoy life ok?
Thank you thank you,
I am very chin chai one, any how any how, no need to help oso can one.
We citizens of singapore urge you to PLEASE MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS.
We DO NOT NEED your help. Every time, you mention HELP, we have to run for cover!!!
Help the poor? Raise GST!
Help traffic flow? Up ERP!
Help passenger service? Up Bus fare/MRT fare!
Help us get taxi? Raise taxi fare!
Help us get good government? Raise Minister and Civil servant salary!
Everytime YOU WANT TO HELP, we all PAY FOR IT!!!
THANK YOU THANK YOU...TOLONG LAH, please, we will HELP OURSELVES, no need your help liao.
We DARE NOT ask for help any more!!!
Sir, most honoured sir, I urge you NOT TO HELP Singapore INVEST also!
Everytime your wife invest, we all lose money! Kao liao, kum siah!
Just let us have a dose of bad governance, like recently the Mat Selamat case, like dat....so far, it is ok, your incompetence, we ACCEPT!
PLEASE DO NOT help us have better security! Wait we all kena PAY FOR IT!!
I believe ALL SINGAPOREANS PREFER NOT TO HAVE CRUTCH MENTALITY!
I think it is ok lah, please just take your salary and enjoy life ok?
Thank you thank you,
I am very chin chai one, any how any how, no need to help oso can one.
May 5, 2008
A true joke about what Singapore has become...
In Singapore, the majority of us live in Highly Dangerous Buildings
(HDB),
And most people have already got used to Paying and Paying (PAP).
Not only do you have to pay, you Pay Until Bankrupt (PUB).
If that's not enough, somebody still Purposely Wants to Dig (PWD) and
get more from you.
So what more can you do when you are in the Money Only Environment
(MOE)?
With the current Mad Accounting System (MAS), you are forced to Pay
the
Sum Ahead (PSA),
Which will leave some people Permanently Owing Some Banks (POSB).
And forced to live on the Loan Techniques Always (LTA) system.
When you fall sick and happen to be admitted to a Money Operating
Hospital (MOH),
You might be able to use your Cash Prior to Funeral (CPF) fund.
If you are out of luck, you may
meet doctors who Never Use Heart (NUH)
to treat you,
And you will be Sure to Give up Hope (SGH).
To help ease the traffic, motorists have to pay Cash On Expressway
(COE).
If that doesn't help, they can always Eternally Raise Prices (ERP)
on the roads.
If you don't own a car, you can always make a Mad Rush to the Train
(MRT),
OR get squashed in a bus Side By Side (SBS).
Lastly, under all these pressures, there are not many places we can
relax,
Not even the good old place we used to go because it has become
So Expensive and Nothing To See Actually (SENTOSA)!!!
(HDB),
And most people have already got used to Paying and Paying (PAP).
Not only do you have to pay, you Pay Until Bankrupt (PUB).
If that's not enough, somebody still Purposely Wants to Dig (PWD) and
get more from you.
So what more can you do when you are in the Money Only Environment
(MOE)?
With the current Mad Accounting System (MAS), you are forced to Pay
the
Sum Ahead (PSA),
Which will leave some people Permanently Owing Some Banks (POSB).
And forced to live on the Loan Techniques Always (LTA) system.
When you fall sick and happen to be admitted to a Money Operating
Hospital (MOH),
You might be able to use your Cash Prior to Funeral (CPF) fund.
If you are out of luck, you may
meet doctors who Never Use Heart (NUH)
to treat you,
And you will be Sure to Give up Hope (SGH).
To help ease the traffic, motorists have to pay Cash On Expressway
(COE).
If that doesn't help, they can always Eternally Raise Prices (ERP)
on the roads.
If you don't own a car, you can always make a Mad Rush to the Train
(MRT),
OR get squashed in a bus Side By Side (SBS).
Lastly, under all these pressures, there are not many places we can
relax,
Not even the good old place we used to go because it has become
So Expensive and Nothing To See Actually (SENTOSA)!!!
May 4, 2008
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